Let’s get heavy for a minute.
You’ve planned a trip. Several thousand miles from home, you are immersed in a new language and culture. You’ve been looking forward to this for months, and needless to say, you’ve invested a considerable amount of money into it at this point. But now that you’ve landed, your “jetlag” doesn’t seem to be wearing off. You’re no longer very motivated to do that walking tour you had planned, and you can’t seem to wake up early enough to get breakfast at that cool little pop-up café.
Mentally, you’ve started crossing things off your itinerary as the prospect of going outside, taking public transit, and interacting with strangers keeps you in bed longer and longer. The less you do, the more disappointed you are with yourself. You feel like you’re ruining your trip and wasting your money, and yet you can’t seem to find it in you to just get up and go.
And it’s not your fault. Depression’s a b*tch.
But what the heck can you do about it? You never know when it’s going to strike, and there’s no foolproof way to make it just vanish. The truth is, if you live with depression, sometimes traveling is just … harder.
But it’s not impossible. Here are a few suggestions for ways to ease the weight off and still have a great adventure:
PRE-DEPARTURE:
Travel Insurance
Travel insurance is a good investment for a number of reasons. A policy with a “Cancel For Any Reason” benefit can save you a lot of money in the long-run if a serious depressive episode hits you right before your trip. Plus, being able to get a reimbursement for the bulk of your travel costs means you won’t be beating yourself up about wasting money, and you can put that cash towards a new trip when you’re feeling up to it.
TravelInsurance.com is a good website for comparing the benefits of different travel insurance agencies.
Build up your support systems.
Sometimes it can be hard to find the right resources in a foreign country. Do you already have a counselor or therapist? Talk to them before you leave. Try to set-up some kind of method to contact them while you’re away. This may be Skype or calling, or even something as simple as texting.
It’s also a good time to test out a mobile therapy app like Talkspace, BetterHelp, or Pride Counseling (for my fellow LGTBQ folks). Try it out before you leave for your trip. It can be harder to do all the initial setup and therapist matching while you’re already in the middle of an episode. If you match with a therapist beforehand, you can inform them of where you’re going and what your plans/expectations are.
Friends and family are also big pillars when it comes to support. In your head, designate a “comfort contact” — someone you feel comfortable reaching out to when you need it. Then let that person know. How you navigate this part is going to depend on your relationship with the person. But you can keep it simple:
“Is it okay if I call you if I really need to?”
“Would you mind checking in if you haven’t heard from me in a while?”
Setting those expectations ahead of time can ease the sense of guilt that comes with thinking you’re being a burden for reaching out.
If you have medication, BRING IT.
Drastically changing environments, cultures, and possibly languages is not the best time to take a break from any regular prescriptions. Make sure you bring them and preferably keep them on you. It’s always better to have something and not need it than to need it and not have it. Don’t feel bad about utilizing any tool or resource that helps you feel more capable.
However, it is important to note the regulations for medications differ all over the world. Make sure you do your research beforehand to know if traveling with your medication will require any specific packaging, labels, doctor’s notes, etc. Also, make sure you’ve adjusted your schedule to include any time differences so that you’re not over- or under-dosing.
ARRIVAL:
Adjust your plan to meet your needs.
If your original travel plan was super ambitious and involved 20 different stops a day, then things can start to feel despairing as soon as you wake-up two hours later than you planned. Don’t be afraid to scale back. There’s nothing wrong with saying, “I’ll maybe see one or two things today and then take it easy.” Even if that one thing is a café around the corner. No one’s judging your travel style.
And at the end of the day, try to focus more on what you did do, rather than what you weren’t able to do.
Keep A Journal.
It won’t necessarily be a fix (although sometimes it can be cathartic enough to get you moving again!), but it can help you understand your mindset better and potentially work through some things.
If you have a hard time putting feelings on paper, try this: Write down one enjoyable thing you did each day. It doesn’t have to be anything grand. Even if you only left your room to get food, or you only talked to a single person all day, or you only saw one thing on your list. Writing can help you reframe those things more positively:
Day 1: Tried a new dish at an authentic restaurant.
Day 2: Had a conversation in the local language.
Day 3: Saw a historic landmark.
Doing this can help motivate you to take smaller steps and still get things done. And when you look back on your trip, you won’t feel like you wasted your time doing nothing at all.
Take A Break From Social Media.
Hear me out. When you’re at a low point, it’s not always helpful to be bombarded with beautiful images of other people enjoying their seemingly flawless travel experiences. We can’t live our lives for Instagram. It may do you some good to step away from it all. Avoid comparing yourself to people whose experiences are likely a lot harder and less picturesque than their profiles would suggest.
Making an active decision to not use social media during your trip can also help deflect the pressure to be constantly taking and posting your own cool pictures. Remind yourself that your trip is not about showing off, and there is nothing requiring you to post a pic of yourself sipping champagne on a balcony overlooking the Eiffel tower.
Most Importantly, Go Easy On Yourself.
Don’t spend all of your time in a foreign country beating yourself up. You don’t deserve that, even if that’s hard to believe. Especially on a solo trip where you might be the only person who’s got your back. Treat yourself the way you would treat your best friend.
You got this.
