No, it was not setting the phone in focus mode or setting reminders on YouTube watch time. I did that, did not work for me.
Here is what made me progress from being a slave of my phone to a master (in the process) of it:
Build and strengthen your why.
My Why was “ Discover and get good at a skill to get your freedom”.
I mean freedom to own my time. I was not locked in a virtual cell, whose bail amount had to be from my freelance project. To get good at the skill I had to spend a considerable time honing the skill and not scrolling on my phone. I used to pause and remind myself of my Why.
What is your Why?
Find an anchor that gives you joy.
For me, it was reading, writing, playing outdoors, and going to Yoga class.
I liked the joy when I hit publish, the calmness that yoga brought, and the lively energy that the outdoors infused in me. I stopped taking my phone to the yoga class. I had to rekindle my lost love for things I used to obsess over and enjoy.
What did you do before the smartphone era? What activity engrossed you completely and made you forget that the world existed?
Environment
I keep my phone in another room while working. Classic!
I realized when I was driven and engrossed in my work, I did not even have the urge to check my phone repeatedly.
Some people have their internet on 24*7 because someone might reach out in case of an emergency. Yes, why not? Because texting through the internet is the only way to reach out in an emergency. I think subconsciously they just want to remain connected all the time.
If someone has an emergency, they will call, What’s the need to keep your internet on or your phone glued to you 24*7?
Notifications
All application notifications except banking are off on my phone.
You might think if you have a phone in another room, and seldom check your phone, what is the fuss about notifications if you won’t see them anyway? It is for the time when I want to spend or do something on my phone. It has happened a gazillion times that I opened the phone to check for something, opened a notification, landed somewhere else(in my head and my phone), and then forgot what I opened the phone for.
Nowadays, attention has become fleeting. You need to keep yours for the things that make you happy and help you grow. Control what you give attention to and it definitely should not be every boop on your phone.
Distractions (Realizations and Actions)
Most of my Instagram, and LinkedIn feeds did not make me happy, helped me to progress, or power through the day. It used to weigh me down.
I deactivated my Instagram account and uninstalled LinkedIn from my phone.
I used to mindlessly scroll and wishlist items on Myntra (an e-commerce app for fashion in India). My wishlist has 800 items, which I haven’t revisited once!
I uninstalled Myntra. I install it when I have to buy something. Then uninstall it once the whole return and exchange shebang is over.
I had become feed hungry. First thing in the morning, scroll through YouTube and refresh Gmail. Getting bored, scroll through Youtube, and refresh your Gmail. Sitting on the pot, scroll YouTube…. You get the point!
I disabled Gmail and YouTube from my phone.
In addition to the notifications being off on WhatsApp, I have
My mind used to wander after seeing the Whatsapp status of my contacts.
All WhatsApp status updates are on mute on my phone.
My WhatsApp inbox was flooded with messages whenever I used to open it. Over the years, I have become part of more than fifteen groups having many members.
I exited some of them. Archived the rest of the groups (New messages for those archived groups also do not come to my inbox. Instructions for this setting) which were irrelevant to my short-term goals.
If you know (through looking at screen time) that similar Apps like these are eating away your time, go ahead and take action for that.
Overthinking about the future
Everything that popped up on my phone, videos I scrolled through and the posts I saw on LinkedIn used to trigger a thought trail in my mind. I couldn’t recall how I landed on a particular thought from seeing a YouTube video or reading a post.
House tour video. I would Daydream about my future house.
Starting a new job post on LinkedIn. I would daydream about or start searching mindlessly for x,y, or z criteria fulfilling jobs that pay well.
So I created several private YouTube playlists. I keep adding videos/shorts that are relevant to future events in my life like Wedding, Real estate, Clothes inspiration, etc to that playlist.
I have created different notebooks(Travel, Finances, Wedding, Things I want to explore, etc.) on Evernote (a note-taking application) as well. I keep adding relevant things I find in email or while browsing to respective notebooks. I do not dive into reading those at that moment.
Also by making a note of it then, you force your mind to come to the present without the thought “I might never find that solid information again” thought lingering in your mind.
Whenever you realize that you are drifting away from the present, Remind yourself, “Cross the bridge when you come to it.”
OTT Entertainment
I used to start a series at dinner and then binge-watch it till late at night.
So, I cut down one of the two OTT subscriptions I had.
Now, I pause before starting the new intriguing SciFi space series on Prime, especially if it’s after 10 p.m.
I tell myself “You are starting this series, which you will most likely binge-watch till early morning. Then you will wake up feeling lethargic the next morning almost at noon. That energy will drag you through the day. You will feel sad about not fulfilling your daily goals. To alleviate that sadness you will watch something to distract you. The cycle begins. Are you permitting yourself to let this happen?”
I am mindful about what I am watching at what time of the day and what emotion is triggering me to watch it.
You can also try reading the Wiki summary of the episodes. This just completely ruins it for me, and I don’t want to watch it further!
If you find yourself slumping back into the arms of phone addiction, get a fresh start the next day. I am also in the process. A couple of days back to square one is okay unless you do not make it a habit again.
Keep your phone-free streak going!
